By Kenneth Bonett
6/11/2024
3-4 minute read
I once had a patient with alcohol use disorder, found wandering the streets in a disheveled state. When I went to the ED to meet them for the first time, the smell of vomit filled the air as I entered the room. Their eyes, wild and unfocused, darted around as they mumbled incoherently. They could barely stay awake, and each time I tapped them, they would wake with no memory of where they were.
After treatment, they transformed into a different person. Their clarity returned, and we spoke about their past. When I asked what thoughts popped into their head in the moments they felt the urge to drink, they looked at me with deep sorrow and said it was the relentless thoughts of seeing themselves as a failure. They told me that their family and friends had abandoned them after they started drinking. Alcohol was their refuge from the crushing thoughts of inadequacy that haunted them. They believed the world had been cruel, and drinking was their escape.
Their story revealed a profound truth: much of their suffering was born from their own thoughts. It struck me then how our thoughts have the power to shape our reality, a theme that is universally relevant and impactful.
When thoughts arise in consciousness, they have the ability to shape our reality. But what specifically is consciousness? Consciousness can be described as the broader space of awareness in which thoughts, sounds, visual input, bodily sensations, and tastes appear. It is the ever-present backdrop against which all experiences unfold.
What is a thought? A thought is a mental event that appears in an individual’s mind within this wider, open space of consciousness. Thoughts are powerful; they influence our perceptions, decisions, and actions. When we look around at our world, we see that many aspects of our environment, culture, and personal lives are shaped by the thoughts and ideas we collectively hold.
To understand the impact of thoughts, consider that much of our suffering arises from our own minds. The stories we tell ourselves, the judgments we make, and the fears we harbor can all contribute to a distorted perception of reality. By recognizing and addressing these thought patterns, we can begin to reshape our experiences and ultimately our lives.
Learning how to disidentify with these thoughts can be practiced through mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness meditation involves realizing when a thought arises, acknowledging it, and then returning to the present moment. This practice helps us become less lost in thought patterns, allowing us to focus for prolonged periods and recognize when thoughts and narratives no longer serve us.
By snapping back to the present moment and connecting with our senses and emotions, we gain immense power and freedom. This can help us forgive others and ourselves, as we learn to investigate emotions firsthand rather than reacting impulsively. Instead of pushing towards positive emotions and away from negative ones, we can accept all emotions as they arise in consciousness with curiosity and compassion.
For example, if you feel anxiety or any other negative emotion, instead of letting it consume you and reacting off it, you can recognize it as just another appearance in consciousness. You can put it on the same plane as any other sensation, instead of giving the emotion control over your mind. This gives extraordinary power because it shifts the conventional sense of seeing things as good or bad, allowing us to simply recognize emotions as thoughts arising in a wider space of consciousness.
In terms of negative thought patterns, emotions, and narratives, snapping out of these stories frees us to connect more fully with our daily lives and those around us. This helps us drop patterns that no longer serve us, leading to a more present, aware, and connected existence. Just as my patient found clarity by confronting tormenting thoughts and was ready to go to rehab, we too can transform our lives by reshaping the stories we tell ourselves. By doing so, we unlock the power to live more fully and freely, discovering our true potential.
This approach is entirely practical and can be experienced firsthand, regardless of one’s belief system.
